Stress is a real plague in everyday life. We can distinguish good stress from bad stress.
Good stress can help you get through tricky situations or “first times” such as talking in front of an audience, going on a first date or having sex with someone for the first time.
Bad stress, on the other hand, can have very harmful effects on health and morale. Too much stress is never good.
It is common to say that there is no point in stressing over something you can’t control. And it’s true!
So stop stressing about things you can’t control.
Above all, know that there are ways to do it if you put your mind to it. Besides, frankly, it’s exhausting to always want to control everything, isn’t it?
Stress: Understanding what it’s all about
Stress is a form of tension – physical or mental – that results in a very unpleasant feeling of discomfort. Good stress should not be confused with bad stress.
Good stress is the kind of stress you can feel when you’re preparing for a happy event such as a big birthday party, a wedding or a trip. Bad stress is stress that puts your physical and mental health at risk.
There are symptoms that can be used to identify a stressful situation. For example, these symptoms include the following:
- Decreased or increased appetite,
- the tension,
- a weight imbalance,
- sleep disturbances,
- physical pain (headache, backache, stomach ache),
- a drop in energy,
- an angry state,
- the desire to be alone and not see anyone,
- an urge to cry and a feeling of sadness,
One can also mention states of stress that do not last.
Of course, just because this type of stress is ephemeral does not mean that it is not without risk. It often happens in situations such as an overload of work, an argument with someone you love or too many small everyday worries such as delays or traffic jams…
One thing is certain: stress cannot be controlled by abusing alcohol or taking drugs.
Tips to stop stressing about what you can’t control
The first thing to do if you want to stop stressing about things you can’t control is to step back.
In fact, ask yourself if there is anything you can do that will have a direct influence on the thing that is stressing you out. Often you stress about things that are beyond your control, so if you have no way of controlling the thing, you are stressing unnecessarily because your stress will not change anything.
Learn to detach yourself from what you can’t control. If you have no control over this thing, let it go and don’t let the stress get to you.
Focus on the positive things in your life. Take some distance.
Being active in physical activity or sports can go a long way to helping you deal with your stress. It doesn’t matter if it’s yoga, running, cycling or whatever. Do something that allows you to get some fresh air and let off steam.
You can add meditation to this. Meditation allows you to do exercises with your breath. If you meditate every day for even 5 or 10 minutes a day, you will find that it is effective against stress.
Meditation should be practiced in an environment and at a time that is conducive to it. You must be able to succeed in relaxing or, at least, in reducing your stress through mediation. Another tip: if for example you are in your car, in the middle of traffic jams.
You may be feeling stressed. But traffic jams are one of those things you can’t control at all. Either you have an alternative route to avoid traffic jams, or you have to be patient.
To help you do this, breathe in and out deeply, 3 times in a row. You will see, it will calm you down greatly. You can do this exercise in any stressful situation over which you have absolutely no control. Little by little, you will learn to stop stressing about things you can’t control.
Also, don’t neglect the anti-stress power of those around you. There is bound to be someone in your family or circle of friends whose company you enjoy and who doesn’t make you feel any stress. Don’t hesitate to spend time with this person (or these people, if there are several of them) to help you combat your stress.
It is a very good trick to spend time with someone (or people) who never makes you feel stress. To reverse this, avoid people and situations that make you feel stressed.
You too, do something that will give you a good dose of satisfaction and well-being.
Do something you enjoy or indulge your passion or try something for the first time.
Think about doing something good for yourself and multiply the sensations of well-being and happiness for yourself.
Take a trip to a spa for a massage and pampering; visit an art exhibition; do a favor for someone who needs it; etc.
The most important thing is that you focus on all the positive things in and around you.
A little organization to anticipate and manage your stress
Sometimes you may experience recurring stress states.
This can be a moment near your period or anything that can happen and recur each month. With a little organization, you can anticipate and manage your stress.
In a notebook and/or calendar, you could write down the dates and times when you feel stress.
If you know the reason, write it down. Little by little, you will see when these stressful moments occur and you will be able to anticipate them in order to reduce or even eliminate them completely.
To go further, you can go straight to the point of detailing each stressful situation by writing down in your notebook the reason for the stress, what exactly you felt (physically and mentally), how you reacted in that specific stressful situation and what you did to get rid of it (example: the 3 deep inhalations / exhalations, meditation an activity you enjoy, etc.).
Talk about it around you. Avoid isolating yourself. If you don’t feel like talking about your stress to everyone around you, choose one or two people who have positive effects on you and who, above all, know how to listen to you and support you. Don’t talk about your stressful situations with people who would only add to your stress.
Be careful about what you eat. What you eat has a direct impact on your physical and mental health. Therefore, if you eat poorly, you’re putting yourself under stress.
Whereas if you adopt a balanced diet, you’ll find it easier to fight and chase away bad stress.
The same goes for sleep. It is extremely important that you get enough sleep to reduce the onset and intensity of stress. If you don’t get enough and bad sleep, you will often be a victim of stress because you won’t be able to think clearly and your body will be tired and therefore vulnerable.
When you manage to anticipate and/or manage your stress, congratulate yourself. Do something to reward yourself such as buying a new piece of clothing or eating your favorite dessert or anything else that pleases you.
Now, stay on track.
You don’t have to give yourself something every time you succeed in chasing your stress away. Do it at the beginning to encourage you, but the goal is to do it in the long run, naturally and consistently.
If, despite all these tips, you are not able to anticipate and/or manage your stress, do not hesitate to ask a specialist for advice. First of all, there is no shame in talking about it and, moreover, by addressing yourself to a professional, he or she will be able to provide you with additional solutions adapted to your case.
To put it plainly, you have to know how to differentiate between good stress and bad stress.
Good stress is necessary in positive situations. Bad stress is to be fought so as not to destroy your physical and mental health. Fortunately, bad stress can be fought and, as we have seen together, there are several ways to do so.
What do you think about stress? Do you ever feel stressed about things you can’t control? If so, stop it right now! Tell us about your experiences and tell us what you think about it as a commentary.